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Horsback riding

A blonde named Anna had a near death experience. The other ...

The breathalyzer!

One day while on patrol, a police officer pulled over a car...

Stranded on a desert island

A blonde, a brunette and a readhead are stuck on an island....

A blonde in Las Vegas

In Vegas, a blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a cok...

Stranded blonde

A blonde woman is driving along a country road, out in rolling hills of the Midw...

Three blondes and a wish

There are three blondes washed up on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and off...


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Dog in heat

A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the bloc...

Cat and the rooster

There was a cat and a rooster wondering by a lake. Both were famished, looking f...

Bear hunting

Every year, Bob goes hunting during bear season. One year, Bob goes hunting, and...

A grasshopper walks into a bar

A grasshopper walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bar tender turns to the...

A cat goes to heaven

A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, "You've been ...

Three tough mice

Three mice are at a bar, having drinks, talking about how tough they are. The fi...

The swearing parrot

There's a guy who owns a parrot that swears like a sailor. He can swear for five...

Well endowed

A man walks into a bar and sees a jar with money in it and a horse standing n...

Washing the dog

A young boy, about eight years old, was at the corner "Mom & Pop" grocery pic...

Jesus is watching you

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tipto...

Xmas Like A Day At the Office

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and...

U of Berkeley Products

There are two major products to come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX This...


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Tea Time

Something to ponder... Do the workers at the Lipton factory get a coffee bre...

Some shorties...one rude

Q: Why did Smokey the Bear never have any children? A: When his wife got ho...

Signs

Sign on a brake repair shop in Joliet, Illinois, "We stand in front of our work....

Pain Relief

A man walks in for a sale rep job. He is very qualitfied, but he has a nervous t...

Maths?

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out wit...

Mail carriers.

What kind of drugs are mail carriers not tested for? SPEED!...

ALWAYS GIVE 100% AT WORK: 12% Monday 23% Tuesday 40% Wednesday ...

Driving Examiner

Liz: I get so nervous and frightened during driving tests! Doctor: Never min...

Aggies

Do you know why the Texas Aggies use artificial turf in their football stadium? ...

A Train and a Teacher?

What's the difference between a Train and Teacher? A train says, "Chew,...

Who's The Boss?

When the Lord made Man, all the parts of the body argued over who would be the B...

What Gets Bigger?

Mr. Perkins, the biology instructor at a posh suburban girl's junior college, sa...


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Turkey and the Bull...

Chatting with a bull, a turkey sighed and said, "I would love to be able to get ...

Traveling Saleman.

Mr. Jones, upon returning from a business trip was shocked to find his wife in b...

The morning after

Bob woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a pounding headache, co...

The Layoff

The vice-president of a local company had quite a problem. He was told by hi...

Talk like an adult!

The Grade 2 pupils returned to class after the long weekend. Their teacher told ...

Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.)

TO : ALL EMPLOYEES FR : MANAGEMENT SUBJECT : SPECIAL HIGH IN...

Smart little johnny

One day the teacher walks into her classroom and announces to the class that on ...

Shiny New Motorcycle

An engineering student is walking on campus one day, when another engineer stude...

S.H.I.T (Special High Intensity Traning)

Special High Intensity Training - S.H.I.T. MEMORANDUM TO: All ...

Research paper excuses!

A college professor had just finished explaining how important it was that a res...

Preschoolers learn meat

A preschool teacher thought it would be interesting for her students to learn to...

Pick your sport carefully.

After a two year long study, the National Science Foundation announced the follo...


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Overheard In Airplane

The huge Air Canada Jumbo jet is just coming into Pearson Airport (Toronto) on i...

One Drink too many!

After the annual office Christmas party blowout, John woke up with a pounding he...

Multi-syllable words

Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says "Today we are going to learn ...

Little Johnny's Lessson

One day Ms. Nelson, a kindergarden teacher, was giving a lesson on imagination. ...

Little johnny at school 2

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked h...

Little boy learns arithmetic.

A little boy is in school working on his arithmetic. The teacher says, "Imagine ...

Howe 2 right gud

Nowe u two can rite gud! Howe two rite gud Frank L. Visco Vice-...

How shit happens!

In The Beginning was The Plan. And then came the Assumptions And th...

Here's Little Johnny!...

The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something...

Here's Little Johnny!

A teacher in New York City wanted to see how many animals the city kids in her f...

He shouldn't have asked!

MR. SMITH got himself a new secretary. She was young, sweet and pretty. ...

English Lesson

The teacher of the fourth grade class was giving an English lesson: "Al...


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Don't Erase This

One day when the teacher walked to the black board, she noticed someone had writ...

Definition of a good date!

These three women were roommates. One night they all had all gone out on dates a...

Deductive Reasoning

Neighbor 1: "Hi, there, new neighbor, it sure is a mighty nice day to be moving....

COMMAND REDUCTION OF ARMY PERSONNEL ( C.R.A.P. )

As a result of DOD budget cutbacks, we are forced to reduce the size of the forc...

Be Poetic

"When a customer comes into the shop, be very polite to them and try to put a li...

A short poem for today.

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to ...




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